Saturday, March 12, 2011

I want to go home!

Warning: HUGE VENT coming!

So we've been in Vicenza for 2 days. And I HATE IT HERE! I want to go home! This place sucks.

Getting here wasn't bad at all. Being here blows. Everyone thinks Italy is such a great place to be. Ugh? Have you actually come here? If you haven't, don't come here to live.

~I've looked up tickets to fly home about 20 times in the first 48 hours being here. That is sad. I'm willing to pay 11 THOUSAND dollars to get out of hell. I hate it that much!

Let's see... The great things about being here?
Um..... um......
OH! Dan's people he works with put a very wonderful gift basket and set up for us in our hotel room. They are all very sweet people.

~ the px isn't bad. Quite surprising.
~ THERE IS NO FRG!!! THIS IS AMAZING AND MAKES ME HAPPY!

Anything else? Not a chance.

Now... the awful things about being here.

~The fact that I can't understand anyone
~AFN sucks and doesn't even have cartoons for my babies
~This place smells
~It is so damn small here.
~We have no idea where anything is... and the map they have us isn't even accurate.
~We have no way of getting anywhere other then our feet. Which is fine.. if stupid ass people knew how to drive
~I AM SO FUCKING TIRED OF PEOPLE STARING AT ME. I just want to cry.
~I have never felt so out of place in my life.
~I hate Euro's
~I can't even take pictures on post. WTF soldiers are even allowed to take pictures in war zones. But I am not allowed to show my family where we are living.
~All of our household goods are here and who the hell knows when we can go look at houses. Apparently getting info on that is not first on my husbands list. Well, 2 weeks tops I am staying in this hotel. The 14 day mark I am packing up and flying back to the states where we belong.
~Next time I hear, it's all what you make it. I am going to fly off the handle on that person. What the fuck can you 'make' out of nothing? NOTHING!

Since I hate it so much here I am not doing anything. I am not fixing my ID to be able to come freely on and off post. Why would I? There isn't shit on post. I would consider it wonderful if I never had to step foot on this scum place again.

I am NOT going to the newcomers welcome thing. I don't care to know shit about this place. I have no interest. I just want a damn house. So I can sit there and rot for the next 1093 days.. That is the countdown until the end of this tour. UGH!


I've never been this depressed in my entire life. I really think I am on the verge of a mental break down. This is not like me. If you really 'KNOW' me. I will talk to anyone. I adjust well. I LOVE moving. I am usually a bitch, yes. But that is just one of my awesome traits, but not in a bad way. There is no way that I will make 3 years here. I don't want to live here for 3 years.

I haven't had a conversation with an adult (besides my husband), in person for longer then 6 minutes in days and its really getting to me.

Seriously, as a military wife, I've done 2 deployments, one of which my husband was injured. I never ask for anything. I don't complain when my husband isn't home.

Is it really fair that I have to sit here with tears streaming down my face because I have never been so unhappy in my life? I just want to go home. I want to have a normal life again. I am sick of living in a hotel. I need a home for my kids. I want to be able to cook my kids a real meal, not eat out and not eat snacks and sandwiches. Its been weeks.... weeks since we've good a real meal.

I hate this place.





4 comments:

  1. Jenn believe me when I say I felt that way when we moved to Cuba (and there you can't get off base at all) and then right to Spain at first we were off base in a hotel then in the base lodge for at least 2 weeks before we got housing and we where beginning to think we would have to look off base (thank God because of my husbands job we HAD to be on base).
    Jenn once you have been there awhile and find things and get out and about you will most likely love it (or at the least like it). Oh and once you get back to the states you will never be able to order a Cupochino from Starbucks again as you will know what the real thing taste like. Another thing when you have authentic Italian food you will love it (DH says to ask for Monkey balls it's a desert [puff pastry filled with cream drizzled with chocolate] you will love them as will the kids).
    We did A LOT of deployments in our time with Navy him on ship twice (before computers,e-mail,skype,oovoo and satellite phones)and then he was a flier (aircrew) and would be gone anywhere from 1 day to 3 months (and that was while overseas).
    Keep your chin up tell Dan that you HAVE to find a house and get settled with your things, this will help you out A LOT and tell him if Momma ain't happy he won't be "happy" (wink) that should get him moving on the housing. Go to the base indoc class get your ID card taken care (as well as the kids) and then work on the license.
    Once you are totally settled go out and explore (there is public transportation there from what my DH says) go to other places Go see Rome and other areas go to France and Spain see Germany take a trip to England, Ireland & Scotland (hey they all speak English so it maybe the Queens English but it is English). I'm sure you will met other wives (spouses) from the base that you can make friends with as well.
    I DO UNDERSTAND you I was in your shoes if you need to vent I am here for you on Military wife to another.

    Melinda

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  2. Ok...I hope I don't annoy you by saying this, but it gets better. I promise! When I first got here I was in culture shock and I'd wanted to go to Italy for so long. It takes getting used to. Italians and the culture are different and I still get pissed off sometimes while dealing with them.

    If you want to do coffee or something this week let me know. I'll be glad to meet you on post and have a drink and talk if you want. Email me at newgirlonpost@live.com and I'll give you my cell number. I'm busy the first two days of the week, but I should be free after that.

    I really think you should go to the Newcomer's class or the Benvenuto Class that ACS offers. I know you said you don't want to, but you get off post for parts of it and get acquainted with the area. It's worth it and it helps with adjusting to life here. I'll be glad to help you adjust any way you can.

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  3. Im sorry things arent working out for you hon. Believe it or not I felt that way when we first moved from nyc to Virginia and still do lol. Ive always hated it here till this day then to make matters worse were moving next month to an even smaller town.Lord help me if I make it there for 3 years lol. I cant imagine what it must be like being so far from home. It must really suck ass. You seem like a fun and nice girl so maybe in time youll meet some friends there and may grow to like it.I hope it all works out hon.Hey at least you get to see youve lived in Italy thats something not everybody can say so at least theres one upside lol. We put in for orders there and got turned down so off to small town number 2 for us lol.Good luck hon and I know you dont know me but you can hit me up if you ever need to chat.

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  4. I know that you don't know me, but this post made me want to give you a huge hug, so here it is ::huge hug from a stranger::

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